


Being Human

by babyrubysoho



Series: Cherish [4]
Category: Nightmare (Band), Penicillin (Band)
Genre: Anal Sex, Dominance, Evil Sakito, Feisty Uke, M/M, Multi, Oral Sex, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Power Dynamics, Ruka is a Dumbass, Threesome - M/M/M, kinky fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-07
Updated: 2016-10-07
Packaged: 2018-08-20 00:56:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,704
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8230669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/babyrubysoho/pseuds/babyrubysoho
Summary: No-plot kinky fluff sequel to the rest of the Cherish series:Following one hot and revealing afternoon of car sex, Ruka is attempting the impossible: to have a relationship with Sakito. And be normal. And get laid without leaving bruises. In order to do this, he needs to turn Sakito into a human being. His experiments so far have involved the strategic use of: embarrassing bandmates, sex toys, and blackmail. And now it's the turn of the threesome. What are the odds of succeeding...?





	

**Author's Note:**

> Title totally stolen from a really good TV show. Like so many of my titles...  
> Like Heel, this is much lighter in tone than Cherish and Drive, and is just an excuse to write kinky sex games. Enjoy!

Sakito and I have been up all night songwriting. Not together, because that’s not something we do, but at least in the same apartment. I can hear the plink of his guitar and his low, melodic hum from behind the closed kitchen door, which is distracting but oddly pleasant. By the time we finally go to bed it’s morning, and his face is pale and sleepily self-satisfied. He yawns, mutters something unintelligible at me and flops down onto the far side of the covers; I want to kiss him goodnight, like normal people do. But it’d take a braver man than me to cross Sakito when he’s tired, so I burrow down under my meagre share of duvet and try to sleep.

Now, in all the time we were together (if that’s what you want to call it), Sakito and I only _slept_ together on a handful of occasions. So I’m not used to it, and my reflexes still aren’t fully alongside the concept of ‘Sakito = safe’. Which means I’m constantly waking up, heart in my mouth, my nerves screaming _danger!_ Then I look across and see him sleeping beside me, features losing all their complexity in the solemn expression that seems to be his face at rest. I always feel like holding him then, but suspect he’ll wake up the instant I touch him and punch me just out of habit. So I go back to sleep, and wait for it to happen all over again.

What am I doing? You may well ask. Why am I putting myself in the perilous position that comes from letting Sakito back into my bed?

Because I want to be _normal_. I want a normal life with the person I…well, the person I want. And he’s the one I want; there’s no helping it. I’ve known this ever since that afternoon in his car, and just _sometimes_ I think it’s what he wants, too. Unfortunately, ‘normal’ is so far outside Sakito’s frame of reference he doesn’t even know what it looks like. But we try.

 

* * *

 

 

It dawns on me pretty early in our bid to be ordinary that Sakito and I have a serious problem (all right, so that’s hardly a newsflash, but this particular one I hadn’t considered): that we’re so screwed-up, the pair of us, we’ve forgotten how to have regular sex. Oh, we gave it a go, and fifteen minutes later I was on my back underneath him with a black eye and what felt like a broken spine. This kind of thing is gonna be hard to get past because Saki _likes_ it, and so do I, and I don’t know how to stop it escalating again. But it’s too fucked up. I think, sometimes, about the day I ripped out his earring, and cringe.

“I don't want us to get into that again,” I tell him, after one particularly amazing session that trod very close to the line of abuse on both sides; and I’m serious, because hurting him feels too good to be right. “Not again.”

“...I’ll make a deal with you,” says Sakito, after he sees I mean it. Well, that’s a start.

“I’m listening.”

“Once a year,” he suggests. “We’ll make it a rule. On _your_ birthday I’ll put on those stupid stripper shoes and you can do whatever you like with me.” Oh good god, _yes_.

“And on _your_ birthday?” I demand, worriedly. He looks right at me, and the excited burn in those beautiful eyes is chilling.

“I want all-out, no-holds-barred _war_.” Bloody hell.

 

* * *

 

In the months since that conversation we’ve both done our best to limit our abusive tendencies to the realms of extreme bitchiness and light emotional blackmail. Sometimes I have to try so hard to restrain myself from smacking him that I think it’s actually injuring me, and going by the expression on his perfect face I know he’s dealing with exactly the same feeling. Still, it’s worth it just to have him close to me; the uptight, high-maintenance, exquisite _jerk_.

Uptight. That’s what I think of when I think of Saki now. That’s what’s going on when you strip away all that delicious sex and violence and manipulation: Sakito just cannot figure out his place in the world or how he should relate to the people in it, and the fact makes him awkward and embarrassed and simply _horrible_ to live with. I was right all along, his perfect poise and cool friendship are a mask: fake as a facelift. But I’m beginning to suspect that the demonic under-layer is just as much of a construct.

Sakito doesn’t know _what_ he is.

And yeah, call me a sucker (for I am), but I’m starting to feel sorry for him. I want him to be comfortable, and sure of himself, and dare I even say _happy_? And I want to be the one to make it happen. My naïve side tells me this is out of general philanthropy and the desire to be a good friend and lover; my cynical bastard side tells me it’s about gaining control. As usual. No prizes for guessing which is more accurate.

Either way, my first step on Sakito’s mandatory road to self-discovery is to get rid of that uptight high-and-mighty pride so that we can, god forbid, have a grown-up conversation about our wishes, needs, insecurities, and the whole gamut of adult philosophical bullshit. This, I am soon forced to conclude, is easier said than done.

 

* * *

 

 

You’d think that someone who’d been in a band with Yomi (not to mention Chiba) for the last decade would, by now, be completely impervious to embarrassment, or at least have learned to sulk until it goes away (I speak from experience). But Sakito, Senka lives aside, is so careful of his dignity as to be impossible. And you know what they say: pride is a sin. So that’s the first thing to take care of.

I unwisely try to tackle the issue by straight-out _talking_ to Saki. This was doomed from the start given his low opinion of my intellect, and his preference for criticism to be delivered at a shout with one of us backed up against the wall as a prelude to sex.

“Why get all weird about it?” I complain one night, referring to Saki’s less than delighted response to a drunk and possibly insane woman making a physical pass at him on the rush-hour train. Reverse _chikan_ , very rare, but something most guys would laugh off afterwards. Not Sakito. I see this as a good opening for the ‘uptight’ discussion. “Indignity is just an inevitable event,” I tell him. “Happens to the best of us.”

“Not if I can help it,” he says flatly. I frown, and he darts a sharp glance at me. “And while we’re being critical bitches, how about you not being such a bad-tempered prick all the time? Not getting the sulks whenever something irritates you. Hmm?”

“All right, so we both have issues to work on.” But his are worse!

“And how do I ‘work on’ dignity?” he demands snidely.

“That’s up to you.” It isn’t, it’s up to me, but I’m hardly gonna tell Sakito about my grand plan to turn him into a human being.

“...I’m willing to think about it,” he concedes eventually, to my surprise. This is a major step forward. _If_ he means it. I grin at him wryly.

“Let’s go drinking with Zozzy, then. That should take care of undignified _and_ irritating at the same time.”

Sakito laughs, which makes me unreasonably happy, so I risk a bump of my shoulder against his. He gives me a measuring glance, then leans against me. I turn on the TV, moving slowly so as not to spook him, and he stretches luxuriously and settles down.

Is it lame that this is what I’ve always wanted?

 

* * *

 

 

I feel quite pleased with myself, at first. Until the next time it happens, and the next. Turns out Sakito didn’t mean what he said after all, because he is still uptight as hell and quick to humiliate. And when he gets embarrassed he gets angry, and then there’s no more talking.

After that first failure, I try all sorts of other, dumber, things to shock him past his embarrassment: springing Chiba on him (doesn’t work, he just shifts into the Satty persona, and Satty is way too much _fun_ to let it bother him); bringing out the sex toys, because the bedroom is where he has the least inhibitions (nope, he didn’t like that one bit, Sakito’s tastes are extreme but narrow and it just led to the kind of vicious fight I’ve been trying to avoid); even offering to tell our bandmates exactly what their perfect guitarist lets me do to him (which I’d never do, and he knows it: it would make me sound like a psycho).

So, time for my latest brainwave. This is an idea I’ve been tiptoeing around for a while now, because it’s kind of extreme for me (yeah, funny, I know). And the idea is: humiliating Sakito by letting someone _see_ what he’s really like behind closed doors. Someone other than me. This is the part that’s giving me trouble, because although I’m hardly a prude at this point the idea of _sharing_ him makes me feel all wonky and possessive. Is this a stupid idea? I’m pretty sure it is.

Then again, if I dislike it, Saki would _hate_ it. Perhaps enough to knock the pride out of him once and for all. Probably. Maybe. But it really depends.

My only problem is _who_. For convenience sake I start with the people in my immediate vicinity. Yomi: dear god just no. Hitsu-kun: would be more embarrassed and horrified than Sakito and probably fall in love with him to boot, which he half is already. So no. Ni~ya-chan: refreshingly free from morals and a pervy sod into the bargain, but too addicted to tits to be interested. All right, that didn’t take long. I guess I’ll have to look further afield.

 

  
“Yes, yes and yes again,” says Hakuei immediately. Then his gaze drifts off into the middle distance and a filthy smile spreads leisurely over his face.

“Shall I give you some private time?” I ask acidly. It's not like I’d expected Hakuei to refuse my proposal, exactly, but I thought even he would need a couple of minutes to get his head round the fact that I am a) fucking Sakito and b) willing to double-team (well, one-and-a-half team) him for his own good.

“No. Let’s go,” Hakuei suggests eagerly.

“What, _now_?”

“Why not?” He shrugs. “You gotta take these opportunities as they come to you, Ruka,” he opines, throwing an expansive arm round my shoulders. Hmph. “And you know I always wanted to do a guy.” This is true; Hakuei isn’t exactly shy when it comes to broadcasting his tastes to the world at large, which is why I asked him in the first place. For a moment I start second-guessing myself, ‘cos the bugger is actually very good-looking and I don’t want him to cramp my style; then I console myself with the fact that Sakito really doesn’t care about looks: he’s only interested in temper.

“Er...all right, then. I think he’s still at my place.”

“Great.” Hakuei smirks. “What did you say his problem is? Stroppy? Uptight? Don’t worry, I’ll soon loosen him up.” I feel duty-bound to at least give Hakuei some warning, smug git though he is.

“Be careful, that’s all. If he decides he doesn’t like it...well, he can be lethal.”

“That pretty little beanpole?” says Hakuei, with a snort of derision at my lameness. “I could bend him over and snap him with one hand.”

“He’ll chew you up and spit you out.” Hakuei shakes his head pityingly at me. What an idiot. Well, he’ll learn soon enough if this backfires.

 

I jam the key in my front door and wiggle it bad-temperedly. The ride over here hasn’t reassured me that this is going to go smoothly; still, whatever happens, I think I can guarantee that Saki will find the whole situation hideously embarrassing, because Hakuei is on _my_ side, and besides, they don’t know each other well enough for Sakito to get past his awkwardness with strangers.

Hakuei strides right up to Sakito, who is unsuspectingly making toast, and cuts off his attempt at a surprised greeting by grabbing the back of his neck and kissing him summarily on the mouth. Bit of a shock to me too, but who can expect Hakuei to behave? I raise my eyebrows; he’s got balls, I'll give him that. But not, perhaps, for long: I see Sakito shoot me a wild glare out of the corner of his eye, Hakuei’s lips still glued to his like a particularly persistent limpet. Admittedly it wasn’t my original plan, but seeing Hakuei get his face ripped off might be an equally entertaining (and likely) option at this point.

 Sakito’s lovely eyes shoot daggers at me for a few more seconds, and I can sense the brain behind them working frantically, that pretty blush spreading across his cheeks. Then, to my utter surprise, his thick lashes slide closed and he rises up on tiptoe, lips parting at a practiced nudge from Hakuei’s tongue.

 What the bloody buggery hell is this?! I wonder, my mouth falling open as he allows the older man to tug him close. What happened to the violent little hell-beast I was counting on? My whole plan, you may as well know, was to get Saki into his vicious spitting-cobra mode (which I was sure could be achieved by the mere suggestion of a threesome), and then, with Hakuei as a sort of supporting chorus / voyeur, to push past it and force him to deal with the humiliation of having a stranger see him come undone. So why isn’t it bloody well working?

 “Mmm...” Sakito lets out a quiet moan as Hakuei’s presumptuous hand slides down his back to grab his ass and squeeze. I scowl, perplexed. At that moment Saki opens his eyes again and fixes me with a look of pure evil, before tearing Hakuei’s shirt open enthusiastically and deliberately turning his back on me to kiss the bigger man’s tattooed shoulder. Fuck. He’s figured it out, the sly devil, and this is now gonna be a useless exercise in terms of getting him to engage with his humiliation: Sakito won’t waste time being humiliated when there’s a chance he can embarrass the fuck out of _me_ instead.

“Dunno what you were talking about, Ruka,” states Hakuei delightedly, as if in direct response to this thought, as Sakito leans into his caressing hand like a flower reaching for the sun. Hakuei has the tshirt up and over his head in a flash, and spins him round to press up against his back, fingers attacking his small nipples and the jewel in his navel, giving me quite a show. “He’s perfect!” Sakito finds time to give me a lightning-fast withering glance (he doesn’t like being talked about as if he’s a doll, I can tell, but seems willing to endure it if it means he can get one over on me) before his eyes close and his lips part under my smug bastard friend’s teasing ministrations.

 “ _Is_ he.” I fold my arms grouchily.

 “Well, maybe not for _you_.” Self-satisfied bugger. This is the opposite of things going according to plan. But I find I can’t look away as Hakuei sets his hands to Sakito’s petite waist, sliding the grey sweatpants over his hips and off, taking his underwear with them. I think I catch another tiny blush, a slight tension in the willowy limbs, but it’s soon gone as Hakuei grinds his pelvis against Sakito’s ass and begins to encourage his hard-on greedily. He looks absolutely delicious like this, and I’m not the only one to think so: Hakuei sets a hand beneath his chin and tilts his head to gaze down at his flushed face.

 “You are one beautiful creature,” he says, sounding almost amazed. “Doesn’t he ever tell you that?”

 “ _No_ ,” replies Sakito drily, leaning up into the hand framing his face. He’s damn right I don’t: Sakito knows exactly what I think of his appearance, and he’s vain enough as it is.

 “What a waste.” Hakuei sets his inked hand to the nape of Sakito’s neck and pushes him forward, steering him opportunistically towards the living-room. “You come and play with _me_.”

 “Make yourself at home!” I say sarcastically, trailing grumpily after them. I get a smartass grin from Hakuei for that, and an unreadable look from Sakito.

 Before I’m done sulking Hakuei has miraculously located the lube I left under the sofa and shoved Sakito down face-first over the coffee table without a second thought. I wince, mostly for Hakuei's sake, because surely there’s no way Saki will put up with _that_. But instead of attempting to disembowel his hapless assailant he keeps eerily silent, and then Hakuei’s long fingers are inside him, pushing his slim legs apart with ease and briskly opening him up. Sakito muffles a series of ambiguous sounds in the glass of the table, clinging to its edge as my over-excited chum kneads his ass appreciatively. Hakuei has a definite boner, which I’m not sure is something I ever wanted to be in the same room with, although it’s a bit late to find that out now.

 “You ready to go, pretty thing?” he demands urgently, unzipping. I sneak a peek, can’t help it. Just wrong. Sakito, perhaps worried about what he’ll say if he opens his mouth at all, keeps quiet. Hakuei evidently interprets this as a yes, grabbing his slender hips and manoeuvring him into a more convenient position. Sakito makes an extravagantly delighted sound as Hakuei enters him, and I bristle: he’s clearly doing it specifically to hack me off, because really, how good can Hakuei be?

 “Oh, you are just fucking _perfect_ , honey,” my friend purrs in an annoyingly complacent tone, grabbing the back of Sakito’s elegant neck for leverage and hearing him gasp in approval. I feel my face settle further into its habitual glower; turns out Hakuei is anything but gentle, and that’s just what Saki likes. Hakuei twists one hand into the cool brown of his hair and tugs his head up, pushing harder into him. Sakito moans sharply, and _that_ doesn’t sound fake; he gazes up at me, expression glazed with pleasure above his deep-seated disapproval, Hakuei’s hand gliding up his flat stomach to tease at his nipples some more. Hmm. I don’t know if I like this. But my dick says I do, so I might as well show Hakuei who’s boss, and worry about Saki’s vengeance later.

 Approaching them, I reach out and clasp Sakito’s jaw, drawing him towards me and unbuckling my belt. He gives me a snarl, then, like he can’t help himself, and turns his head away. He is _pissed_ after all, and suddenly I’m feeling slightly apprehensive about letting him anywhere near the vicinity of my pants; but I can’t let either of them see me back down.

 “Sakito-kun, behave,” pipes up Hakuei caressingly, aiming a warning smack at Saki’s perfect behind. For just an instant Saki turns pale with what I interpret as anger, a whimper of reluctant response slipping from his lips; then he obediently reaches for me, fingers and teeth ripping open my jeans. Christ, that’s hot, and seriously fucking annoying, because I don’t care to imagine what would happen to _me_ if I tried to spank him; but he’s behaving like a textbook submissive for Hakuei, who is giving me a grin over his head. Great, now he thinks _he’s_ in charge! Which he isn’t. No, the moment we walked in here Sakito took control. I was a damn idiot to think I could outfox him, and now I look like one too.

 “ _Ruka_ ,” murmurs Sakito against my stomach, in a tone I can’t interpret. He meets my eyes again, beautiful face half furious and half pleading, not dropping his lashes as he takes me into his mouth but staring right up at me, which is both hot and super freaky. He looks amazing like this, smooth back curved in a pleasing arc, Hakuei’s fingers biting into the line of his hips, taking me deeper every time my friend’s enthusiasm rocks him forward.

 “Ruka,” Hakuei echoes, in a much more irritating tone, “...Seriously...Your little pet is really, _really_ good...!” More fool him. I glance down in trepidation to see how Sakito likes that dirty word when it’s applied to _him_ ; but he seems not to have heard, his clever hands and lips making my head spin, brow furrowed in concentration. I decide that I might as well take advantage of this good behaviour while it lasts, because I already know I am not going to like the aftermath. So I tangle my fingers in his hair encouragingly and pull him closer, enjoying his involuntary moans as Hakuei speeds up.

 Despite all my sulking and moping this whole situation has me appallingly excited, so when Hakuei comes (making a face I never need to see again, thank you very much) I’m not far behind. Sakito gives a muffled cry but swallows anyway. Hakuei is stroking the small of his back, like he doesn’t want to break contact, which I can well understand.

 Eventually we both let Saki go, and he turns over to drape himself artistically across the table and gaze up at Hakuei. He’s trembling with arousal, absolutely magnificent, and I see my sometime vocalist go a bit starry-eyed at the sight. Brilliant. I sigh, and try to get my breath back.

 “ _Please_...” begs Sakito, in a way he’d never have been able to do if I hadn’t spent so much effort forcing the damn word out of him before, staring into Hakuei’s eyes and ignoring me completely. Pair of bastards. “Hakuei-san...” Hakuei leans down then and kisses him, long braids framing his face, and suddenly I’m jealous, jealous, _jealous_. Ridiculous, when I know this is just one of Sakito’s performances; but he’s acting so nice, and I do not like it.

 “Touch yourself,” orders Hakuei, swiping his thumb slowly across Sakito’s bottom lip. He obeys, and I see the older man’s pupils dilate at the sight. “Good boy.” Another condescending phrase that Saki would never take from _me_. “I wanna see you come.” Sakito nods shakily and delicately licks his lip where Hakuei’s digit touched it. He continues stroking himself, shooting me a glance to see what effect he’s having, so quick that I'm sure only I notice; I feel the sizzle in the connection, which cheers me up very slightly because I think that’s something only _we_ have.

 “...Can I?” asks Sakito, turning his attention back to Hakuei, still acting like little mister perfect. Hakuei nods, watching him intently, breathing fast. Sakito lets his head fall back on his long neck and abandons himself to his orgasm, and the two of us drink in the sight like a couple of voyeuristic perverts.

 “...Fucking beautiful.” Hakuei drops onto the sofa and mercifully re-arranges himself, a broad, satiated grin splitting his face. I lean against a bookcase and await developments, because I have no idea what Saki is going to do next.

 So far, so good. Sakito leans up on his elbows, looking thoroughly debauched, and watches him in silence, a sweet smile playing at the corner of his mouth. He’s still ignoring me, which is probably just as well. But every second of Sakito’s attention is making Hakuei look more and more smug; he’s sitting there preening himself, adjusting his braids and not taking his eyes off my bandmate for an instant.

It’s about then that I sense, with alarm, that Sakito’s current focus on Hakuei is a weighing-up: Hakuei is pretty much his type, being both aggressive and a dumbass (yes, I know what that says about me), and it’s not unreasonable to imagine that Saki might still like to be a pet owner, as it were.

 “That,” Hakuei tells him, blithely unaware of the fate that may be awaiting him, “was awesome.”

 “...Thanks,” says Sakito, still giving it the good-boy act. Hakuei digs around in his pocket and lights up one of his poncy black cigarettes, relaxing indolently and looking between us in amusement.

 “And after all the stuff he told me about you.” Hakuei jerks his head at me. The fucker, I am going to _end_ him. He’s finding this hilarious, I can tell. Sakito’s lips thin as he spares me a fleeting glance.

 “Can I get you anything, Hakuei-san?” he asks, getting tentatively to his feet. Hakuei’s eyes gleam appreciatively.

 “Beer.” Sakito stalks, insofar as he can right now, across the room, brushing past me on his way to the kitchen. As usual he’s completely unconcerned with his nakedness, and we both watch him go lasciviously. He’s in there a suspiciously long time, and I find I have nothing to say to Hakuei at the moment; I’m not sure whether I feel more pissed or sorry for him, if Saki has indeed decided to make him his latest playmate. For his part, he just beams at me in his infinite smugness and blows smoke in my direction. This venture has accomplished absolutely nothing.

 Sakito comes back with the beer (surprisingly including me in his waitress service), allows Hakuei to perv on him some more, then says his polite goodbyes and disappears into the bathroom.

 “Just call me any time you wanna play!” yells Hakuei after him. I allow myself a small, private smile, my half-assed sympathy evaporating: if Sakito wants to adopt him, fine. He deserves everything he gets.

 Later, once I’ve managed to pry Hakuei off the sofa and out of my apartment, I install myself in his vacated seat and proceed to get paranoid. It must have just _killed_ Sakito to behave so out of character all afternoon, and the fact that he was the clear winner of this round doesn’t mean he won’t take it out on me with all the weapons at his disposal.

 “Coffee?” I suggest placatingly, once he emerges from the bathroom. He shakes his damp head silently and approaches the sofa, while I try and hide the fact that I’ve gone rigid all over with apprehension. Moving cautiously he perches himself on the edge of the seat beside me, and with every breath he takes I’m steeling myself for his attack. He doesn’t do anything, just sits there, and his silence is making me feel guilty, just like it used to. I think I’m regressing.

 “...Sorry,” I mutter, when the atmosphere between us is so awkward I can’t stand it. Sakito gives me a long, complicated look, then finally moves; I flinch, but he just leans against my side, tucking his head under my chin. Once I’ve finished being surprised, then suspicious, I fold an arm around him and scoop him closer; he feels weird, both tense and yielding at the same time.

 “You okay?” I ask cautiously. Silence again for a long time, just the feeling of his soft breath against my collarbone.

 “...Yeah,” he says. After a while, his hand comes up to slide around my waist. I gather my courage and wrap him up in my arms, burying my face in his fragrant hair, and for once he lets me. I don’t know what this is. But it’s sweet.

 “Don’t play with Hakuei,” I venture, while I’ve got him in this peculiar mood. I don’t even care anymore that my lesson was a complete failure. I rub my thumb back and forth behind his ear, one of the pleasure spots only I know about.

 “Jealous?” comes Saki’s voice. He sounds ambivalent about the idea.

 “Maybe,” I admit ungraciously. Some more thoughtful quiet.

 “...All right, then.”

 

Now I don’t even know who won, or if I’ve taken a step forward or a step back in my quest to help Sakito out of his appalling personality. But…maybe, maybe, it was worth it.

**Author's Note:**

> So, I chose Hakuei to make up the threesome because I like seeing Ruka in trouble, and from their interactions in videos and stuff it seems Hakuei kind of has the upper hand with him most of the time XD


End file.
